Plants

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls (why is it like that? I mean the order it’s always said in. Something to ponder on. Now back to the program), I would like to present to you for the very first time *drum roll please…

Cassandra the Aloe Vera

She joins my only other plant, Lucy the (well I don’t know what kind of plant Lucy is. She’s a very long, hard to pronounce, Latin sounding variety of plant).

Now why would I find new plants so exciting that I have to name them?

Let me tell you.

I have, how shall I put this, I have the opposite of a green thumb (a red thumb maybe… That is the color opposite green on the color wheel. But then that would also make it the complimentary color to green… Hmm I don’t know, we’ll have to come back to this).

Most of the plants I’ve ever had sole responsibility over in my life, have died. The worst part of this is that they were all succulents. That’s right, the most impossible to kill plants on the face of the earth and in my care: dead.

Now that I am 20, and fully considered a mostly responsible adult, I intend to change that.

Hence, naming my plants.

I find this makes them seem more like children. Children produce emotional attachment. Thus, by naming the plants I develop an emotional attachment to them and am more motivated to keep them alive.

This is why I recommend naming any plants in your house that you don’t want to die. Also it comes off as a bit insane so it’ll keep most of the weirdos away.

At some point I want to have this window sill full of succulents.

All of which I won’t let die